Get all 5 Pastel Hell releases available on Bandcamp and save 10%.
Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Charm Machine, Ruthie, Cherished Abuse, Endless Righteous Mourning, and Welcome (Demonstration).
1. |
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you were something to aspire to
a perfect poem
a tearless afternoon
now you're gone
& you took my hope away
now i can't see the good in anything
in anything
or any other face
Mimi Jayne.
i don't ever hear a loser say
"better to have loved & lost
than not loved at all"
i don't agree
that it's worth the trade
put me back to the way I was before
Mimi Jayne
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2. |
After Egodeath
02:38
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itās rare
a bloom under the moon
after egodeath
(garden or grave?)
itās rare
canāt compare
a love iāve never known
and will not know again
(not on this plane)
itās rare
i see escape in your shattered shape
tie your tether to me tightly
thereās a tear
in the swaddling cloth
I know you feel it, too
(Lavenderās Blue)
thereās a tear
still we dare
to hold each other close at the precipice
(we havenāt long)
still we dare
still we dareā¦
i see escape in your shattered shape
beautiful & frightening.
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3. |
Hiding
03:21
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(Might be true love)
You feel you are hiding from me
In the bony, leafless wintry woods
Though I could spot you in the sand
As a far-off wave-to-be
You were a concept
Then the concept
Woke up next to me
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4. |
Take No Chance On Love
03:59
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Take No Chance On Love
The romantics are all dead
And there's a cynic in your bed
My baby love always leaves me
And she never says goodbye
A whole generation
Who won't look you in the eye
You walk up so proudly
To accept your Grammy
You want approval badly
and the tribunal hath declared
I'm heading to the barrel
To go fishing with my magnum
My vision is in tandem
With my sales
Take no chance on love
The romantics are all dead
And there's a cynic in your bed
My baby love always leaves me
And she never says goodbye
A whole generation
Who won't look you in the eye
The hyperbolic chamber
Makes a genius
of an average painter
Makes an otherwise humble layman
Prone to opine
Nobody's a winner
Now that breaking news is broken
A slew of tragic words
were spoken
And I feel nothing inside.
So I take no chance on love
The romantics are all dead
And there's a cynic in your bed
My baby love always leaves me
And he never says goodbye
A whole generation
Who won't look you in the eye.
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5. |
Drugs For Function
03:31
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Why'd you buy me flowers, dove?
When they die
I will blame you
I wish I knew
what's made me numb
Drugs for function
Not for fun
I'm trying to picture
Me old & grey
Mother Earth before we fucked her
My hands when they didn't shake
How can you be so capable?
How can you be so brave?
Now that I know you dove
A sober thought
Is rarer than it was
Wish I knew how to rise above
Drugs for function
Not for fun
In trying to picture you
Old & grey
Mother Earth before we fucked her
And your irreplaceable shape
How can you be so beautiful
With oblivion on its way
I'm trying to picture me
Old & grey
Mother Earth before we fucked her
My hands when they didn't shake
I am sick & weak
And people don't change
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6. |
Each Day We're Slain
04:38
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My whisper is my scream
Only another somber soul
Would ever
Notice me.
A tree is falling in the woods
A sphere of blue spins in the blackness
I live on granted breath
But each breath is a new bruise
Pain & pleasure,
Are they not both abuse?
My fingers on
The pulse in someone else's arm
I've come so far
From the bed To the door
The masochist wants more
I want each granted breath
Cause each breath
Is a new bruise
Pain & pleasure
Are they not both abuse?
-
Some ask for more
They ask for too much
And some can't wait
Some can't wait
to buckle under the crush
-
Brain is a ball & a chain
Each day we're slain
The gods could make it up to us
One quiet Sunday.
The neighbors think we're insane
They spot us laughing
by the graves
We live on granted breath
And each breath is a new bruise
Pain & pleasure
Are they not both abuse?
Insatiable soul
Miranda calls a way I have not heard before
Wild roots whisper in the woods
Two spheres of blue
Are stealing glances
I breathe my bedfellow's breath
But each breath is a new bruise
Pain & pleasure
Are they not both abuse?
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7. |
Arsonist On The Bridge
03:59
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One cannot rely on the other
to follow through
One's not the only one
With one's head
half in the noose.
In love in spite
Of best interests.
I don't give a fuck
Who you were
Or who you were with
I just know you're it.
Stale coffee & cold food
Junkies at Sunday school
One day at a time
Until you feel the needle move
A crow perches proud on the straw man
You can't ever go back
You gave a nod to the arsonist on the bridge as you passed
Friends marry &
Friends die
Lovers leave
& lovers die
There's an artful, ancient soul
Stuck in a Dorset girl's last life
A suitor stands
in the rubble of his pride
I can't ever go back
I gave a nod to the arsonist
On the bridge
as I passed.
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8. |
Little Red Running Nose
01:58
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Look in the mirror, girl
Take some time
Take some time
Little red running nose
Twenty years old
Ten years ago...
In your mind
You're ascending through pain & time
But in mine
You are one bad day away from suicide
Look in the mirror, girl
This life is a mad maze for you
No path for an empath
Little red running nose
Twenty years old
Twenty years ago...
In your mind
You're ascending through pain & time
But in mine
You are one bad day away from suicide
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9. |
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The curse of time
& the work you left behind
Little gorgeous guache glimmers
'Gainst the blackness
Of endless mourning
Righteous mourning
You dance, mamacita
With wicked grace
You were born with that face
& you know
That you could hurt me
(Cmon hurt me)
The curse of time
& the curse of your taste
I'll spend the night
like every night
A gin-soaked heart
In mourning
Endless mourning
You hula, mamacita
With wicked grace
You were born with that face
& you know
That you could hurt me
(Cmon hurt me)
You've changed
You've changed my whole life
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10. |
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You're still here at dawn
Carving into a heart of stone
A waning candle on the pane
On my face a proud sun shone
You spit in my mouth
Because I asked so nice
Laughing kiss on collarbone
Two more for the Danse Macabre line
And whose is this hand
That's holding mine???
The odds against are wild
Like getting out alive
The hourglass hath been flipped
And every breath
Is a choice
Rejoice, rejoice.
I'm still here at dawn
But the bags of drugs are gone
Where are the ones I love?
And when does this all stop?
Buried my mother's mother
And I'm sure she's not far behind
And then I
And on down the line...
And whose is this
Trite & wasted life???
I forget you have to try
I need you to remind me
The hourglass hath been flipped
And every breath
Is a choice
Rejoice, rejoice.
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11. |
Never Strangers
05:03
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//
And when we are both settled
You could come see me in Berlin
I'll be singing songs
With your name in them
//
I spoke my name
But we were never strangers
Your tongue in my mouth
Amethyst around my neck
Some would beat you
But they could never see you
Falling forever
So another soul could rise
What good is our life, dear?
If we have to live every day of it
In fear
I hate this place
& what it has become
But there's a place,
If you can get to it,
In my heart that's full of love.
You spoke your name
But we were never strangers
My tongue could never
change you
With a word or a kiss
I found some grace
In the saddest little face
And I've got lips & a light for it
As long as we both shall live
What good is our life, dear?
If we have to live every day of it
In fear
I hate this place
& what it has become
But there's a place,
If you can get to it,
In my heart that's full of love.
((I don't trust you))
((But I don't want truth))
((Your purple blood
Bled white))
((A glimpse of bliss
For my storm-tossed eyes))
The ancient art of karaoke---
Singing X 'cause
the world's a mess
There's a clown
With the nuclear key
There's just one shoulder
holding up
Your dress
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12. |
Men With No Mothers
04:20
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Who are you to want my lovin?
Who are you to ask??
Men with no mothers
They will not need you
They have learned not to
I can't
I can't be cradled
But I once lived with a lover
Who would play me
Chopin on the grand
While I wept at her pedaling feet
I've got less faith than the Zoar congregation
But I'm no less damned
Men with no mothers
They are not grateful
To see the glass stained
In a new way now.
I can't
I can't be cradled
But I once lived with a lover
Who would play me
Chopin on the grand
While I wept at her pedaling feet.
You could line up every poet
Tell the squad to fire
They'll thank you for their moment
They're not afraid to die
Lord but ain't you done enough damage???
To the Earth
And to the Child.
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